Unanswered Questions Series- Part 1-Healing: “How long does it take to heal?”

How long does it take to heal ?


“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending”  – C.S. Lewis 

I absolutely love this quote because it reminds us that healing is a process. It also reminds us  that how it has always been, does not have to be our story!

Point #1- Healings is not automatic, it’s a process!

We typically don’t give ourselves enough credit and enough time. Often our environment, religion and maybe people in our lives sometimes put unnecessary pressure on us to meet this deadline to heal. You have to take your own journey into your hands and decide with God what’s the best path to take when you start your journey to receive true healing. Healing isn’t just for you it’s for your future !

We need to ask ourselves, “What happens if I never heal from_____?”


Example below. 

Focus: Childhood Trauma 

Question: What happens if  I never heal from childhood trauma? 

Consequence: Pro-longed Abandonment and trust issues , unintentionally push away loved ones, uncontrolled emotions, depression, possible suicidal thoughts if not dealt with soon 


  • Please understand you can’t change friends, family, spouses, significant others or strangers.
  • Please understand you may never get that overdue apology and see changed behavior but that does not mean you can not find closure. 


Point #2- You have to have the desire to be healed to start the process!

Mark 10:51 NIV 

51 “What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asked him.

The blind man said, “Rabbi,(D) I want to see.”

In the “ Blind Bartimaeus (Mark 10: 46–52)” story in the bible there was a blind man begging who desperately desired to be healed from being blind. He was so desperate to receive healing that he did not care how many people told him to shut up when he attempted to get the attention of Jesus as he passed by. 

What always blows my mind about this story is: 

Mark 10:52 NIV 

“52 “Go,” said Jesus, “your faith has healed you.”(E) Immediately he received his sight and followed(F) Jesus along the road.”

Golden Insight :

Our faith is connected to our healing journey! 

This man had been dealing with the issue of impaired vision  for so long and wanted desperately to gain sight. It makes me personally wonder, how bad do we truly want to be healed? 

When the healing process gets ugly and God is showing us ourselves. He is showing us our reactions and how nasty we are because of our pain and bruises. To help us determine if we are truly ready to fix it?  Are we ready to change even if the people that hurt us never do? 

Are we going to let the opinions of others stop us  from getting what we need? 

When we start going on any journey towards greater and walking in our purpose we must understand that everyone is not going with us to the next level. Some of the people we love will remain where they have always been because they refuse to heal. Some people will only want to see you for the person you were when you were in pain.

That’s why once you heal your circle changes, your conversations change, how you interact with others changes. There are major and minor adjustments that take place in different areas of your life after being healed because you want to preserve what God is doing on the inside of you. 

Moving forward

Point#3- Moving forward is a personal choice!

“Unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

– Steve Maraboli 

Sometimes it can feel impossible to move forward from certain situations and experiences. Whether it be your past, certain failed relationships, rejections from school or jobs, rejection  or abuse from  church and family etc. I totally understand and can relate but  my father tells me in Matthew 19:26  that all things are possible with him beside me and because his Holy Spirit dwells on the inside of me. All things being possible includes healing in all areas of our life: spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. If  we know what our father says about our journey then we just have to ask ourselves, “Do I believe? “ 

The quote mentioned earlier by Steve Maraboli, nailed it!

  • We have to let go!
  • We  have to forgive ourselves & the situation 

Say it for the people in the back….  “It’s Over!” 

Often when we hurt we live that hurtful experience over and over in our heart and in our mind. We say to others, “I’m fine.,” “I’m over it.,” “ It doesn’t bother me anymore.” Behind close doors some of us can admit those responses are lies we tell ourselves and others just so we can function. When we repeatedly relive hurtful experiences we are torturing our bodies with pain when we don’t have to be in pain anymore. 

We hold onto that pain because we fear if we forgive and move on, it will happen again and destroy us while our guard is down. If we never move forward and heal we are choosing to live in fear and dwell in pain. 

 We will not operate in a spirit of fear, we will be healed in the name of Jesus. We will move forward because we are Destined For Greater!!


I am on a healing journey myself so just know if you reading this you are not alone. You are not the only one who struggles everyday with forgiveness, I do too.

Porchia Suber sign

Bonus quotes to ponder: 

“If you are busy focusing on the falling bricks, you will never realize that they are truly stepping stones you need to cross over to the next phase of your life.”

– Kemi Sogunle

Blog Post Sources:

All photos that are covered by the Creative Commons Zero license

© Copyright 2021 -Destined For Greater-Porchia Suber

Published by Porchia Suber


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